I really do...I mean, I know I get to see her in less than 2 weeks....And that makes me feel REAL good..don't get me wrong...But I still miss her....Sometimes the only thing better than the Future is the Now...the Present...and Right now at the present moment, I have no Kika here for me to feel in my arms....I guess it's finally just hitting me after all this time away....Again, don't get me wrong, I've been missing her for the longest time....But I didn't feel like Eyore (Winnie the Pooh's friend) all that time till now....
You do'nt understand how much I miss her...I miss her smile...I miss her fragrance...I miss her voice (the phone isn't the same thing)....I miss everything about her....Honestly, if I had my car right now, I'd take a special road trip starting Friday afternoon to a little town in Indiana called Anderson....Even if I could spend just 5 minutes with her, I'd feel so much better....
But I have to wait...I have to wait for a whole 2 weeks...And maybe that's it too....The fact that the time is SO close, but it doesn't come any faster...I mean, at first a few months seemed like a long time because it is, so I mentally prepared for a long time....And now that it's 2 weeks...That sounds like a short time...But it more than certainly feels nothing like it.....Time is just funny that way.....
::Sigh:: Good grief I miss her....And what's more, finals are coming up, so she's doing alot of studying and i'm doing alot of studying...And that leaves time for little talking....But you know what?...When I do see her, it's gonna be a different story...I mean, she'll only be around the corner and I'll have her and she'll have me....And it'd be perfect....AND we get to go to convention....But only thing with that, is that it seems as if all eyes are gonna be on us....That's one time I hope I'm wrong.....But it don't matter, cuz we're gonna be together....
(Wow it's late...4:20am)...I love Kika Amanya Ramsay...And I don't use that word lightly...I absolutely love her....I'm in love with her...She makes me me smile, she makes me laugh, we talk about everything under the sun, she understands me as I understand her, I love her smile (o my GOODNESS i love her smile), i love her laugh, i love the soothing melody of her voice, the feel of her body against mine, the way she pretends she's mad and says "I don't like you" and "Blager", I love her style, i love her essence, i love her beauty (inside as well as out), i love her sense of humor, i love the fact that we can talk for hours, and maybe days, on end, i love the fact that no matter how bad my jokes are she'll laugh with me jsut cuz they're bad, i love the fact that she thinks i'm funny, i love the fact that she loves my artistry as much as i love hers, i love the fact that she thinks i'm a revolutionary, i love the fact that she loves "nerd jokes" just as much as i do, i love the fact that she has a strong personality but equally sensative just the same, i love the fact that she likes the kind of movies that i like, i love the fact taht she's eclectic, i love the way she calls me "Baby", i love the fact that she enjoys the simpler things in life, i love the fact that i can't drink a Slurpee without thinking of her, i love the fact that we can go out but never end up anywhere, i love the fact that we laugh at things for the least obvious reason and know exactly why the other is laughing, i love the fact that she finishes my sentences as i finish hers, i love the fact that i start her sentences as she starts mine, i love the fact that i can sense what she's feeling without a word spoken (even if she's 800 miles away), i love the fact that we have grown SO much closer even if she's 800 miles away, i love the fact that she can make anything look good, i love how i can just carry a tune yet she still says i can sing, i love how she fits oh-so-perfectly in my arms, i love how her hands fit oh-so-perfectly in mine, i love how she has patience for my memory, i love how i can see us together for so many years down the line, i love how she has a thing for short, built guys with facial hair :), i love how she sings, i love how she can feel for others so well, i love how she brings emotion out of me when i've always had a tough time trying, i love how i've been writing all this about her and only 20minutes have passed, i love her desire for knowledge, i love her bank of knowledge, i love the fact that she's a reader, i love the fact that she's a writer, i love the fact that she's passionate about everything she does, i even love the beauty of her uncommon name, i love teh fact that she's one in a billion, i love the fact that she's a woman and not a girl, i love the fact that i wake up thinking about her as well as when i go to sleep, i love the fact that she is all this and so much more to me, i love the fact that we can start a conversation with the outcome of the day, move to politics, talk about movies, shift to black history, discuss religion, and finish with our "I love you"s....
There is so much I love about Kika that i have no idea where the list ends, and i'm pretty sure that it just about never will....but all in all, what makes all those things special is that they are all different parts/aspects of her....these things and more make up who she is....So I guess the most accurate way to say it is just, quite simply...